iger Woods Signs $15 Million Deal To Endorse Alex Rodriguez

[theweaselking]

Alex Rodriguez, the business-savvy, image-conscious Yankees third-baseman, formally announced Sunday that he has signed golf superstar Tiger Woods to a three-year, $15 million endorsement deal, ensuring that Rodriguez will have Woods' considerable marketing power behind him for the foreseeable future.

"Tiger Woods is the most marketable and well-liked athlete in the world," Rodriguez said. "As someone who aspires to be precisely those same things, it is an honor to have Tiger on board to help promote me."

Under the basic conditions of the contract, Woods is required to attend at least 40 Yankees games per season in full A-Rod regalia, appear at A-Rod-related functions in order to stand within 10 feet of A-Rod, and say three or more nice things about A-Rod to the press each week, making sure to always refer to the former home-run champ by the nickname/brand name "A-Rod."

"Tiger is not only the best at what he does, but he's the consummate professional and a true gentleman," Rodriguez said. "In short, he has all the qualities I want people to think of when they think 'Alex Rodriguez.'"