(no subject)
Aug. 26th, 2004 01:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
theweaselkingDiary of Indignities, Special Addition:
"Don't use one of those little Handi-Vac things to empty an ashtray. Because the inrush of air could potentially reignite any fading embers. And, uh, a big jet of flame might shoot out of the thing, surprising you and making you scream like a ten-year-old girl. And you might knock over your beer.
If you're ever fishing, and a poisonous water moccasin swims up to try and eat one of the fish on your stringer, and you think that maybe flipping the snake out of the water and onto, say, me is a good idea, please reconsider.
Just because you can stick toothpicks in your forehead and they'll stay there and it doesn't really hurt all that bad doesn’t mean you should go ahead and do it, at Denny's or any other restaurant.
All those skinheads over there? They'll beat your ass."
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This is an excellent site, that I read often and haven't linked to, yet. You will laugh. He's probably not work safe. Read and learn.
"Don't use one of those little Handi-Vac things to empty an ashtray. Because the inrush of air could potentially reignite any fading embers. And, uh, a big jet of flame might shoot out of the thing, surprising you and making you scream like a ten-year-old girl. And you might knock over your beer.
If you're ever fishing, and a poisonous water moccasin swims up to try and eat one of the fish on your stringer, and you think that maybe flipping the snake out of the water and onto, say, me is a good idea, please reconsider.
Just because you can stick toothpicks in your forehead and they'll stay there and it doesn't really hurt all that bad doesn’t mean you should go ahead and do it, at Denny's or any other restaurant.
All those skinheads over there? They'll beat your ass."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is an excellent site, that I read often and haven't linked to, yet. You will laugh. He's probably not work safe. Read and learn.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-25 10:11 pm (UTC)"If someone passes out on the couch and you want to put them in a figure-four leglock, ensure that the hold is correctly applied before they wake and fuck your goddamn knee all up."