The Evil Alphabet

[theweaselking]

Everyone knows the military alphabet is intended to make phone and radio communication unambigious. K is Kilo, H is Hotel, S is Sierra.

There needs to be a version of this for people who hate the people we're talking to, where the letter is silent or with an unusual sound, or, bare minimum, the word will break their fragile little brains.

I've got a start:

C as in Cyst.
E as in Effluent
H as in Haute
J as in Johan
M as in Mnemonic
P as in Psychotherapy.
T as in Tsunami
X as in Xenomorph
Y as in Yttric.

I need the rest. (or, if you can think of them, better ones for these)
Yes, my phone firewall HAS failed me today. How could you tell?
Edit:

Aegis
B
Cue
Djinn
Eye
F
Gnat
Honest
Ian
Jalapeno
Knot
L
Mnemonic
Ng
Oedipus
Psychic
Queue
R
S
Tsunami
Uell
V
Wye
Xenomorphic
Yew
Z

Suggestions for the missing ones?

Comments

[ex-iocaste2.livejournal.com]

Fan of Stoppard's "Jumpers," are you? There's a scene where the main character calls the cops and in spelling his name says "W as in Wittgenstein, I as in Jehovah ..."

[theweaselking.livejournal.com]

I'm afraid I'm not familiar with "Jumpers".

I as in Jehovah is *so* going in there, though. Wittgenstein isn't as good, although "E as in Einstein" may be a better choice than effluent.

[mrbankies.livejournal.com]

Some suggestions of varying quality:

A - Arsenic, Anthrax
B - Bubonic
C - Cyanide (alternative to cyst)
D - Dead, Deadly, Death, Deathly, Decompose (your choice)
I - Iocane (a bit obscure perhaps)
J - Judas
K - Knife
N - Noxious
P - Plague
Q - Quisling
S - Sulfuric
V - Vitriol, Vitriolic
Z - Zombie

[mrbankies.livejournal.com]

Also
P - Pustule, one of my favorite words.

[thette.livejournal.com]

Johan is the Swedish name for J.

[theweaselking.livejournal.com]

But it's pronounced as the English "Y", usually, which makes it perfect for this.

The point is to say "[Letter] as in [word the starts with letter, but doesn't use the letter's sound at all]"

So "P as in Psychic" or "C as in Cyst" - both using "S" sounds.

[thormation.livejournal.com]

A as in Aerie
C as in Cthonnic
G as in Gnome
H as in Honor
L as in Llama
N as in Ng
O as in Oedipus
P as in Pteradactyl or Psychosis
Q as in Queue
S as in Schweppes
X as in Xi
Y as in Yvette

Just off the top of my head.

[corruptedjasper.livejournal.com]

From old threads in a group I frequent:

Aegis, Cue, Eye, Gnat, Honest, Ian, Knot, Mnemonic,
Oedipus, Psycho, Quay, Tsunami, Wye, Xylophone, Ytterbium
Czar, Queue, Urinary, Junta, Ghoti, Llama, Ngaio, Uell, Gneiss, Gnostic, Jalapeno, Llanelli, Uillean, Uighur, Nguyen, Sugar, Rwanda, Djinn, Bdelloid, Ctenophore, Opossum, Royce, Pterodactyl, Ypres, Yew, Pneumonia, Phlegm, Psychotic, Hoe, Pseudonym, Fin.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to integrate all the suggestions in the replies here and produce the definitive non-phonetic alfabet.

[theweaselking.livejournal.com]

Got nineteen good ones so far. Post is updated.

[corruptedjasper.livejournal.com]

Llewellyn. (pronounce ch-luhwellin, where the ch is one of those sounds english speaking people can't make)

E as in Eye and i as in I combine well. Like Cue/Queue.

[(Anonymous)]

Fornicate.

[harald387.livejournal.com]

Er, the previous post was me, and it was meant to be a new comment, not a reply. Ahwell.

-K