(no subject)

I prefer the original script:

Panel 1
Captain:
IT'S FUNNY THAT I CAN WORK
SIDE-BY-SIDE WITH A TENTACLED
MONSTER. MY ANCESTORS WOULD
HAVE BEEN HORRIFIED.
Alien:
AH.
Captain:
YES, ANCIENT HUMAN LORE IS FILLED
WITH TALES OF SEA MONSTERS AND SLIMY
CREATURES OF THE NETHERWORLD. IT'S
A FIXATION OF SORTS FOR MY PEOPLE.
Alien:
MM.

Panel 2
Captain:
THE JAPANESE, FOR EXAMPLE, HAD A WHOLE
SUBCULTURE OF ART AND LITERATURE REVOLVING
AROUND SEXUAL RELATIONS BETWEEN HUMANS
AND TENTACLE BEASTS.
Alien:
SO YOU'VE SAID.
Captain:
AH, DID I? THAT'S RIGHT.

Panel 3
Captain:
AND YOU SAID YOU DON'T DO THAT.
NOT EVER.
BUT WHAT ABOUT SPECIAL
CIRCUMSTANCES, SUCH AS...
Alien:
CAPTAIN, YOU'RE ABOUT ONE
RHETORICAL HOP FROM A
SEXUAL HARASSMENT CHARGE.

"Yes, that dude is totally drumming on cheese"

original link here, stolen from flemco

(no subject)

Vince Neil falls off stage, breaks leg midconcert.

Speaking of chemically modified folks,
Heroin addict turned Christ addict arrested after punching out a man who wanted to park in the spot that the addict and his 4-meter tall wheeled crucifix were occupying.

While I'm talking about the deeply insane,
Psychopaths make the best stock traders.

Moving from the insane to those just not thinking too clearly,
One man killed and two other injured when his "souvenir" hand grenade goes off while he's playing with it.

Back to the insane AND the not-thinking-too-clearly,
The guy who hitchhiked across the US border covered in human blood, carrying a blood-spattered chainsaw, having just murdered his two neighbours, has been extradited. Just remember: Homeland Security let this guy through, but Robert Kennedy, Cat Stevens, and anyone with a funny accent? They get the cavity search, the no-fly orders, and the deportation.

Kitty Porn!

What the result might look like, someday:

(no subject)

Galveston, TX evacuated as Hurricane Rita approaches.

Rita is expected to be a Category 3 at landfall, arriving anywhere along the coasts of Texas and Lousiana, but most likely directly through Galveston.

Prophetic quote of the day:

Galveston County Judge Jim Yarborough urged residents to take responsibility for their safety.
"Government can't do better than you can do for yourselves," he said.

... or won't do better if you're poor, which amounts to pretty much the same thing.