I love advertising sometimes.

[theweaselking]

"Sparklers can transform any celebration into something magical. Use Sparklers in nighttime weddings to add a touch of romance. Click here to learn more about using sparklers in weddings. Give them out at backyard parties to add an extra dose of fun. And, of course, sparklers are always a hit on July 4th, New Year's Eve, or Diwali celebrations.

The best wedding sparklers are the long-lasting #14 Gold or #20 Gold. They are also very effective in exorcisms. All sparklers are wonderful for bringing and ridding curses. Use them to liven up your next funeral. If you light up enough of them, they may even raise the dead!"

Comments

[sanityimpaired.livejournal.com]

"USA Shipments Only, Cannot Be Exported"

Must be a US exorcism trade secret.

[lorelei76.livejournal.com]

"liven up your next funeral"

Who needs voodoo priestesses: just wave some sparklers over your dead dad and in seconds, you've got yourself your very own shambling zombie!

I need to put that on my will -- on my memorial party, there will be sparklers (along with strippers, gambling, karaoke and massive amounts of drinking.)

[aeduna.livejournal.com]

If you light up enough of them all at once, you can see it from about 5km away :) Allegedly.

[opaqueplanet.livejournal.com]

Diwali! and voodoo! multicultural, aren't they!

I are the advertiser

[hegilliam.livejournal.com]

I never in a million years thought anyone would appreciate my weird sense of humor in that line. --Harry Gilliam www.skylighter.com

Re: I are the advertiser

[theweaselking.livejournal.com]

It is absolutely brilliant, and I will totally buy your sparklers should I ever need to raise the dead or perform an exorcism.

Re: I are the advertiser

[hegilliam.livejournal.com]

Cool! Yall come see us.

We also assist the public in the viral spread of UFO sightings through the ahhhh.... creative application of Sky Lanterns to empty sky. See "WHAT IS REALLY BEHIND THE RAPID INCREASE IN UFO SIGHTINGS THIS YEAR" in one of our newsletters at http://www.skylighter.com/skylighter_info_pages/article.asp?Item=120#UFO. I'm thinking of running a contest for everyone who can generate his own UFO news report (Best TV report, best newspaper report, etc.).