theweaselking: (Default)
[personal profile] theweaselking
Christian group: "The people of Haiti have not suffered enough!"

They're sending Bibles. Not just any Bibles, though. They're sending SOLAR POWERED Bibles that have speakers to broadcast the Bible stories to you and your closest 300 neighbours.

No, really.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 02:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kierthos.livejournal.com
Yeah, screw all that medical aid, food, water, and shelter... let's get 'em some talking Bibles!

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 02:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] madfishmonger.livejournal.com
They're so....thoughtful?

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 02:51 pm (UTC)

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 02:56 pm (UTC)
ext_8707: Taken in front of Carnegie Hall (mesna)
From: [identity profile] ronebofh.livejournal.com
Maybe they should send Denzel Washington to read from the Book of Eli.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 02:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chizzer.livejournal.com
*Feel* from the book of Eli.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 11:26 pm (UTC)
jerril: A cartoon head with caucasian skin, brown hair, and glasses. (Default)
From: [personal profile] jerril
No, the correct verb is read. Braille is a perfectly real technology. Miraculous onion skin thin braille in itty bitty font that doesnt' get squashed flat being packed together like sighted printing is mythological, but braille is real. And you READ braille.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anivair.livejournal.com
They were going to, but the helicopter they were sending him in only had a 400 pound workable payload and his book was just too heavy.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dgg.livejournal.com
Well...I'm sure these things can be cannibalized for parts at least?

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anton-p-nym.livejournal.com
If they were the traditional "Gideon" format, they'd be much more readily cannibalized for parts... and, as sanitation paper, would do Haitians a lot more good than these glorified "Speak 'n Spells".

-- Steve knows that knowledge is power, but in this case the knowledge isn't pertinent to immediate needs. (And, IMO, is of rather dubious provenance in any case.)

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 04:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dgg.livejournal.com
Like I said to a colleague of mine earlier. “Educated decisions is not an article of faith.”

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] flemco.livejournal.com
You have no earthly concept of how much I want one of these bibles.

I can feel the desire for one leaking from every pore, tainting every follicle, saturating my every fiber. If anyone knows how to get one, I will make it worth your while.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rev-ursa.livejournal.com
I am afraid of what you would do with it. But I'm sure they'll show up on ebay in a few weeks.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
You could just go to their site and request one. (http://www.faithcomesbyhearing.com/proclaimer) They'll probably sell you one.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
In fact, here: 1 (800) 545-6552

Call them to find out the pricing and order it. You want a "Proclaimer"

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zenmonkeykstop.livejournal.com
Then sue them when you can't hear it on the moon.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 07:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lafinjack.livejournal.com
I'm sure God can easily overcome the atmosphere issue.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kierthos.livejournal.com
Why do I picture a talking Bible just screaming "MOTHERFUCKER!" over and over again?

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 10:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cmdr-zoom.livejournal.com
All the evil things you can do with a reprogrammed Teddy Ruxpin, but with that extra touch of blasphemy!

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ursulav.livejournal.com
Do they broadcast in French and Creole, the two official languages of Haiti?

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
Haitian Creole, yes - that's from the article itself.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sparkindarkness.livejournal.com
What in the name of sanity and reason?!

They won';t even get in - there's a huge backlog of aid not abl;e to get into the country due to the severely overtaxed infrastructure - there's no way we cna make room for freaking Bibles


This is just a level of soulless inhumanity that's depressing to watch. To see these victims and see it as a tool for conversion is sick and twisted - and proponents of it pure damn evil

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icedrake.livejournal.com
I'm going to make a small wager, here. I say these are going to not only be allowed to land, but will be distributed fairly rapidly.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 04:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missysedai.livejournal.com
That's all anyone is to an evangelical - something to be converted. See, people don't need real help in the here and now. It's much more important they be "saved" for some nebulous afterlife!

When I waited tables, I used to get the "shareathon" group from the Baptist church up the street. They'd run my ass ragged, then instead of tipping me, leave me one of these (http://www.swansoninc.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=2068). And when I blew a gasket one night and told them they were assholes, they were all "It's your reward in heaven that is important!"

People who do that shit are in no way Christian, and Jesus would beat the fuck out of them for that stunt.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 04:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
"You like getting served food, here on earth, right? Your Waitress works her ass off to get paid with earth-money."

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 04:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gothpanda.livejournal.com
"Jesus would beat the fuck out of them for that stunt"

This is like, my favorite sentence ever, the wrongness of it is SO RIGHT

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 07:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lafinjack.livejournal.com
...then instead of tipping me, leave me one of these.

Twats of the highest order.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-20 05:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jettakd.livejournal.com
I was going to say "Oh well, at least it wasn't Chick tracts", but then the page loaded and yeah, those are worse.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] krinndnz.livejournal.com
On the bright side, this is totally a "living in the future" moment, too.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] silmaril.livejournal.com
I...

How... something of them.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 04:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
I can see their thinking for roughly the same reasons I can see the Scientologists thinking they're helping. (http://theweaselking.livejournal.com/3545389.html?thread=20084781#t20084781)

The fact that they're wrong *and* stupid *and* that a trivial examination of the real world would show this to them is just icing on the cake.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anivair.livejournal.com
Here's a fun game. let's see if we can predict what the people of Haiti will ACTUALLY do with these.

personally, I'm thinking that they'll hotwire them and use the solar power and hand crank feature to power something else like cell phones or other small electronics.

Anyone else have any bright ideas?

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 03:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icedrake.livejournal.com
Given that the population of the country is 96% Christian... I'd say they'll listen to them.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 04:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anivair.livejournal.com
True, but bear in mind that half the population also practices Haitian Voodoo. Actually, now that I think about it, Haitian Voodoo might have great ritual use for a bible that reads itself. Makes for easy chanting.

Also, i wonder how those numbers will start looking after the people of Haiti notice that Pat Robertson called them devil worshipers. if I were a Haitian Christian and a famous Christian leader called me a devil worshiper, I might be a little miffed with the idea.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 04:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icedrake.livejournal.com
I sincerely doubt that anything Pat Robertson says will have Haitians renouncing their faith in droves. As for Vodou, yes, half the population practices it. Clearly, they don't see an irreconcileable conflict. Not sure why they would start now all of a sudden, just because they got some talking bibles.

A side note that may be of interest. Robertson's comment most likely refers to the 1791 Vodou ceremony in Bwa Kayiman, which preceded the uprising. Here is the text from the plaque in the forest.

"The god who created the earth; who created the sun that gives us light.The god who holds up the ocean; who makes the thunder roar. Our God who has ears to hear. You who are hidden in the clouds; who watch us from where you are. You see all that the white has made us suffer. The white man's god asks him to commit crimes. But the god within us wants to do good. Our god, who is so good, so just, he orders us to revenge our wrongs. It's he who will direct our arms and bring us the victory. It's he who will assist us. We all should throw away the image of the white men's god who is so pitiless. Listen to the voice for liberty that sings in all our hearts."

Devil worshippers, clearly. Every last one of them.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 05:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gothpanda.livejournal.com
Voodoo is completely compatible with Catholicism--in fact, it requires it. I am enjoying the idea of using the Proclaimer Bibles in rituals. Fun for the whole family--with chicken blood!

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-21 09:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jaundicedaye.livejournal.com
"We do chicken Rite!"

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 05:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] biomekanic.livejournal.com
The Haitians about themselves: "Hatians are 80% Catholic, 15% Protestant, and 100% Voodoo."

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 09:51 pm (UTC)
ext_37422: three leds (Default)
From: [identity profile] dianavilliers.livejournal.com
Power ham radios, I bet. With all the phone infrastructure out, there's a lot of communication coming out that way, and currently, they're canabalising car battries to power them.
(deleted comment)

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 05:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scixual.livejournal.com
I wish I could remember the passage, but there is somewhere in the bible it says that you should not preach to the hungry before feeding them.

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-19 08:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sophia8.livejournal.com
I don't think there is such an explicit passage, but Matthew Ch 25 contains a great speech from Jesus about feeding the hungry, clothing the naked and so forth:
"Then he will say to those on his left, `Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.' "They also will answer, `Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?' "He will reply, `I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do to one of the least of these, you did not do to me.' AFAIK, Jesus was never recorded as saying anything about preaching and converting.

YES!

Date: 2010-01-19 08:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scatter-muse.livejournal.com
Alright! More camp fire fuel!

(no subject)

Date: 2010-01-20 02:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaosrah.livejournal.com
Have these people ever READ the bible? Love and hope in their hour of need? Umm..

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