Yeah, I don't think the guy in this news story was one of the mopey type of stalkers, they're just depressed with a side order of self-image issues. They see the person they obsess over as someone they can never match up to, imagining them as an impossible ideal. They can be annoying or scary, and can totally ruin your life, but they're more likely to hurt themselves in the long run.
The really scary stalkers don't care about other girls who might return their affections, and they're not necessarily bad with women either. They're sociopaths, the only thing that makes them feel anything is their target.
The difference between them is, the depressed guy takes a photo of you and runs away, calls you and then hangs up, or lurks outside your house at night, as timid as a hare. The sociopath has no concept of embarrassment or shame, and will walk right up to you and be perfectly charming. They're really difficult to spot, until their lack of understanding of basic things like human dignity shows them up. They can try to humiliate your boyfriend in front of you, and wonder why you aren't laughing along with them...
Sorry for replying with such a rant, this news story makes me squick.
Nope, you're perfectly right, so no need to apologize. I totally agree, he's dangerous. Clever and dangerous is a way worse combination than sad and pathetic.
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(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-05 09:41 pm (UTC)However, it's also pretty clever. Most of the stalkers I've seen just mope over people and obsess over them, but this one definitely had some drive.
Maybe next time: less breaking and entering and more actually learning how to talk to single girls.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-05 11:14 pm (UTC)Yeah, I don't think the guy in this news story was one of the mopey type of stalkers, they're just depressed with a side order of self-image issues. They see the person they obsess over as someone they can never match up to, imagining them as an impossible ideal. They can be annoying or scary, and can totally ruin your life, but they're more likely to hurt themselves in the long run.
The really scary stalkers don't care about other girls who might return their affections, and they're not necessarily bad with women either. They're sociopaths, the only thing that makes them feel anything is their target.
The difference between them is, the depressed guy takes a photo of you and runs away, calls you and then hangs up, or lurks outside your house at night, as timid as a hare. The sociopath has no concept of embarrassment or shame, and will walk right up to you and be perfectly charming. They're really difficult to spot, until their lack of understanding of basic things like human dignity shows them up. They can try to humiliate your boyfriend in front of you, and wonder why you aren't laughing along with them...
Sorry for replying with such a rant, this news story makes me squick.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-06 02:17 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-05 09:56 pm (UTC).
.
.
Huh. Essex.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-05 11:05 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-06 10:54 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-04-06 11:05 am (UTC)