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"At some point in our lives, we are all looking for a certain someone. Someone loyal, and giving, and with a great sense of justice. Someone capable of headshotting a Geth trooper at 500 meters with a sniper rifle.

But sometimes we just have to settle for a sensitive biotic who regards us with an almost puppydog-like sense of worship.

This shirt is for those times."

Click the picture to hit the store.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 06:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kafziel.livejournal.com
In Mass Effect 3, Garrus and Tali will bang if you don't interrupt the process by banging one of them first. And you'll walk in on it.

Mass Effect 3 is gonna be *terrible*.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 07:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pappy-legba.livejournal.com
By selecting the proper conversations options, they'll let you join in.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 07:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
If your Paragon value is high enough you can bring along Grunt and his "thresher maw" and it just gets explicit.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 07:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anton-p-nym.livejournal.com
I thought you only got that option if you accept the breeding request on Tuchanka in the second game.

-- Steve's not looking forward to the "search for the cure for Scale Itch" side-quest.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 07:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pappy-legba.livejournal.com
Trust me, it's not nearly as tedious as hunting down waterproof vibration servos for Legion.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 07:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kafziel.livejournal.com
Are you joking? Because I wasn't. That's actually seriously a thing that happens in the game.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 07:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kafziel.livejournal.com
Also, you download EDI into an anatomically correct fembot so Joker can fuck her. Again, not joking, seriously a thing that happens in the game.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 09:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] silmaril.livejournal.com
If you think Joker (and, quite possibly, EDI) didn't already beat you to that by the time _ME3_ opens, you are probably very wrong.
Edited Date: 2012-02-23 09:16 pm (UTC)

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 11:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kafziel.livejournal.com
There's a difference between EDI talking Joker off, and Shepard taking the time and effort to haul the inert body of the fembot assassin that the Illusive Man sent to kill him/her back to the ship, reformatting it, and downloading EDI into it so they can get their bang on directly.

Seriously, you fight the fembot and disable it and Shepard out of absolutely nowhere insists that you have to bring it back to the ship and then it's a whole big mission of dragging it back and fighting off dudes and oh it wakes back up partway there and you have to beat it again.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 07:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
The final boss battle of ME3 is against the zombies of all the squad members who died in the first two games. If none of them died, you have to beat the Illusive Man at Rock Band instead.
Edited Date: 2012-02-23 07:57 pm (UTC)

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 08:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anton-p-nym.livejournal.com
Firstly, that's purported to be a real thing by those reading a document claimed to be a leaked copy of the script... one known to be at least partly wrong, given that it also mentions a character* now known to be available only via DLC. I won't discount that it may be in the game, but I wouldn't count on it being in either.

Secondly, not everyone wants plot spoilers for an upcoming game; please at least try to respect that.

-- Steve has been known to take issue with Spoiler Goons' outrage over, say, telling people that the Titanic sinks... but since the game isn't even on store shelves yet, it'd be nice if folks who didn't want to know the story in advance had that option.

* ROT13: n Cebgurna grnz zrzore, va gur Qnl Bar "Sebz gur Nfurf" QYP zvffvba cnpx.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 08:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kafziel.livejournal.com
The DLC character is a major plot element, they just only join as a squadmate if you have the DLC. Otherwise, just a macguffin.

When the new installment in a major plot-driven series has so absolutely wretched a plot, I consider it a courtesy to warn people away from spending $60 on it. And this thing is shaping up to be Dragon Age 2 bad.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 08:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
Sadly, EA does not want my money, and they have informed me in no uncertain terms that I am not to purchase Mass Effect 3.

So I won't.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 08:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kafziel.livejournal.com
Same. The general abysmal nature of it isn't really relevant to the decision, though it certainly makes it easier.

Though I do really want to know exactly how it comes up in conversation that TIM banged the aforementioned fembot before sending it to kill Shepard.
Edited Date: 2012-02-23 08:31 pm (UTC)

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 08:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
You'll be able to watch it on Youtube by the 10th.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-26 03:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
It's only available on their half-assed not-as-good-as-Steam Origin platform, which contains spyware. Even buying a physical copy requires installing and using Origin - the physical copy is just "a copy of the download that you don't have to download".

#1: I'm not interested in adding a second "track games, keep track of fellow players" app and restarting from scratch on that front
#2: If I *was* willing to switch to a Steam-competitor from Steam, it wouldn't be Origin.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 08:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kafziel.livejournal.com
Also, as the leaked script identified multiple new characters, by name and gimmick, well before they were even *announced*, and that Bioware has responded to the leaked script and confirmed its authenticity (http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2011-11-15-bioware-may-tweak-the-mass-effect-3-story-based-on-feedback-to-leaked-script), I consider it a reliable source for the quality and content.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-26 08:18 pm (UTC)
ashbet: (Migraine)
From: [personal profile] ashbet
Seriously, you are an asshole.

If you wanted to bag on the game so badly, write your own goddamn journal entry and post a link so that people who want to read spoilers can go and look at it. But, seriously -- some of us have been looking forward to learning about the game organically through playing, and you posting spoilers without warning is incredibly rude and entitled.

I don't care what your opinion on the game is, it's inconsiderate as HELL to just throw this shit out so that people who are happily reading through comments suddenly get MASSIVE SPOILERS for a game that, as [livejournal.com profile] anton_p_nym pointed out, isn't even on the shelves yet.

I'm pretty irate that you this, because you've upset someone close to me who genuinely has been carefully AVOIDING game spoilers until now. And that pisses me off to no end.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 08:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anton-p-nym.livejournal.com
Tangential to this, John may want to bust out the candy-coating suit again; Eidos Montreal tweeted that Deus Ex: Human Revolution and its DLC will be 66% off on Steam.

-- Steve had great fun in the game, and thinks the hacking minigame in it is better than a lot of those $1.99 phone games clogging the Intertubes.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-23 08:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theweaselking.livejournal.com
Yeah, I saw it onsale, but:

#1: I already own it. I bought it last time it was $10.

#2: It's really not that great a game. It's not BAD, certainly, but it's didn't eat my brain and make me desperately want to keep playing. I mostly found it very, very slow - lots of slow walking, lots of slow conversations, lots of slow *firefights*. I mean, it's very pretty, but I still found myself regularly going "yeah, okay, get ON with it"

I figure I'll go back and finish it eventually.

(no subject)

Date: 2012-02-25 04:31 pm (UTC)
ext_12920: (mass effect: deadliest)
From: [identity profile] desdenova.livejournal.com
Whatever, man. My Shepard does her own sniping.

#teamkaidan

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