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The most successful Subway customers, of course, are the ones who can't keep their hands off their sandwich. Join your artist in the sandwich assembling process. That sneeze guard is a suggestion. That sneeze guard is trying to intimidate you into staying on the "customer's" side of the partition. Are you a customer? Or are you a man?

If you want avocado, you'll get avocado. Avocado is a fruit; it cannot stand up to you. You are a human being, and a very powerful man. Avocado wants to be on your sandwich. It can't help itself. Your job is to make the avocado realize that you know where it belongs.

- from "A Pickup Artist's Guide to Seducing a Sandwich"

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Important life lessons: In smalltown USA, if you do something that annoys a cop, even something perfectly legal, they will arrest you and kill your dog, slowly, in front of you.

Warning, there's video.