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theweaselkingDear irrational, impossible, nonsensical person:
You say you want a fax machine, and a photocopier, and a scanner - but *not* a printer. No printing possible! And you don't want it available on the network, you just want it to magically work despite specifically wanting to put it in another room from the primary user.
I hate you,
-John
You say you want a fax machine, and a photocopier, and a scanner - but *not* a printer. No printing possible! And you don't want it available on the network, you just want it to magically work despite specifically wanting to put it in another room from the primary user.
I hate you,
-John
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 06:42 pm (UTC)The no-network-remote-use thing I cannot help with, though. Can't you just create a mini-network for that nonprinterdevice only? Surely that should be easy? *run, hide*
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 06:45 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 06:46 pm (UTC)What the user wants, in fact, is a printer/fax/photocopier/scanner with an administrative lockout of the printing functions and no printer drivers installed nor available and the printer service advertising turned off.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 06:47 pm (UTC)How exactly they're going to get the scans, though, is an interesting point.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 06:47 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:07 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:17 pm (UTC)Fascinating.
See how the grey matter counterpoints the eyeballs where the head has exploded? Genius. Sheer Genius.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-18 02:51 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 06:51 pm (UTC)Would that work for you?
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:03 pm (UTC)I'm not looking for solutions, here. I know I have plenty of solutions. I'm venting about the crazy nature of the *question*.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:13 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:17 pm (UTC)No, really. That person does not scan, fax, or photocopy, and prints on a private office printer plugged directly into their computer and reserved for their personal use.
This is also the same person who went through *11* computers in the 2007 calendar year.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:17 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:24 pm (UTC)* Seven different "my PC isn't fast enough, we have a new employee who needs a PC, I will buy a new machine and give my old one to them" incidents,
* four "I've screwed up my machine so badly John will need to reinstall Windows and give it back to me" incidents, including
** one malware infection caused by torrenting pirated software,
** one "it won't boot and I don't know why I only booted off a liveCD and deleted the system32 folder",
** one "I accidentally installed Thumbdrive Ubuntu on the 160GB MAIN HARD DRIVE drive instead of the 8GB USB thumbdrive because I didn't read the menu" incident, and
** one "I deliberately installed Ubuntu and used it for a week, but I can't install Visio or Project. What now?"
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:31 pm (UTC)Ah. Yes. I recall that incident.
Clearly this is the customer who needs to be given a G3 Beige Mac, a copy of Darwin on CD, and an HP scanner and be told to build his own scanner/photocopier/fax/WTFever machine. And be billed for the time and materials.
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 06:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:07 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:25 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:03 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:06 pm (UTC)("All of our problems are solved for $225, my way. Your suggestion is impossible, and the closest thing to it is aggravating, inconvenient, will constantly cause us to lose time working around it, and cost more than $400. DO IT MY WAY" seems to be working. Just slowly.)
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:16 pm (UTC)Possibly phrasing it as "I'm sorry, but the printers that do what you want are a niche market; due to low volume, they all cost $400, compared to the $225 for a more fully-featured machine."
Or, with less lying but probably harder for them to believe, "I'm sory, but the printers that do what you want are a niche market; you'd have to get Cannon to custom design-and-build you one, for about a million dollars."
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-18 09:32 am (UTC)Not that I'm advocating that kind of behavior at all, but, you know, they do sound kind of an asshat ;p
(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:33 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 07:44 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-09-17 10:20 pm (UTC)You should give him/her a hammer, a chisel and a nice flat piece of rock. THat's about the level of use they can handle.